..All of us get lost in the darkness, dreamers learn to steer by the stars..

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-09-14T21:22:00

2005-09-15T01:29:28Z

Oceans apart day after day
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn't stop the pain

If I see you next to never
How can we say forever

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I took for granted, all the times
That I though would last somehow
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' CrAzY

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end if I'm with you
I'll take the chance ....

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-08-21T14:46:00

2005-08-21T21:52:42Z

Everything's going to change now.....

I knew it was going to, but I was avoiding it. Now it's staring me in the face and I don't know what to do........."I've been searching for a reason, and I'm running out of time. I can feel that it's the season...it's time to make up my mind.
And I can't really tell you what I'm gonna do
There are so many thoughts in my head
There are two roads to walk down and one road to choose
So I'm thinking over the things that you've said
Thinking over the things..."

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-08-05T11:12:00

2005-08-05T15:38:02Z

Yikes! It's been awhile....what can I say? I've been a busy girl this summer. I'm currently avoiding my house at all costs, since Danny, Jill and the babies have moved in while their house is getting re-modeled. I love those little girls more than life itself...but having them sleep in my room, play dress-up with all of my clothes and shoes, and being followed into the bathroom while I take a shower all summer is a little too much. Thank god I have Johnny..he adopted me..he is going to file for child support soon from my parents ...hahaha.

So, last night was "Family Night" for John's acadamy. And.. honestly, I was so touched and so proud of him. If you don't know, my boyfriend has been in an intense training academy all summer to become a corrections officer. And, I have to admit, I really didn't want him to do it at all..I mean, yes, the money is great, the benefits are awesome..but to be working in a prison all day long?? The fact that he is going to be working with murderers and rapists on a daily basis scared the crap out of me!! It still does..but after last night and seeing how much time, energy, and work he has put into becoming a trained proffesional...I couldn't help but feel honored to have him as my boyfiend. What they do for our soceity is such a thankless job...and I really hope he knows how proud I am of him. I told him last night on the way home that I really enjoyed being there, meeting his fellow recruits and his (scary!) drill instructors and seeing exactly what they have been doing all summer. The Massachusetts academy is one of the hardest and most difficult in the country and Johnny is third in his class!!! He is truly awesome.... as a boyfriend, best friend, and now corrections officer...and last night, I truly saw that. ******

Baltimore Road Trip!

2005-07-12T02:13:24Z

Soooo...got back from Baltimore at 4am this morning. 11 hour drive home..not a good time. However..the rest of our little red sox trip (went with steph and stacey) was fabulous!! So many stories and inside jokes..so, im just going to highlite the best, and of course..there are pictures to follow:

getting pulled over by State Trooper in CT 2 hours into the trip...$203 speeding ticket...priceless!!!
"Why are you in Pennsylvania????" uhh...whoops
Motel 6
lounging by the pool
our red-neck hotel stalkers!
the Inner Harbour, making the t-shirt, and the "indefinite wait"
Bennigan's lovely service
Camden Yards
watching our beloved Red Sox team...(lose) : (
seeing Jen Alexander....."her two favorite white girls!!"
our BMW boys....
finding the twizzlers in the tinkerbell bag!!
the endless ride home.....introductions in traffic, 100% argument, and the sticker on the tire

Yeh, next year...we're flying! : ) GO SOX

steph and i before going to the inner harbour

downtown baltimore...the inner harbour...so gorgeous

stacey, steph, and me..cutest sox fans ever

Dean dancers reunited!! Steph, me and Jen...awwwww

Bad news

2005-06-29T13:57:21Z

Johnny can't go to James Taylor now : (

Stupid academy.....ruins everything.

Hopefully, my back-up plan works, and Diana will come...BSC tailgate party tonite at Tweeter Center!!

However, it's not going to be pretty when i have to work 12 hours tomorrow...

....oh well...screw it!

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-06-26T14:32:00

2005-06-26T21:59:56Z

Apparantly, I only update with pictures now....hehe

So, johnny and I got back from the Cape a little while ago. We had an awesome time..just the two of us...of course. Highlights: Oasis traffic (NOT)... my new boyfriend ; ) .... sandy sandwiches on the beach, clamcakes at Salty's, johnny beating me at Pirates Cove twice, the joke shop, not getting our cards read, the search for the perfect hoodie, Gringo's, my new favorite drink, Peter Mac, seeing Stoozy and co. wasted, Olive Garden for lunch on the way home...yay, so much fun...i hate how my vacation is over. : ( Here are some pics for YOU to enjoy......

yeh, im hot..you can say it ; )

johnny and me dining at Gringo's

Updating on Vay-Kay!!

2005-06-20T19:19:51Z

Yup, I'm on vacation!!! After a very busy and stressful last week, I can now relax and look forward to a whole lotta nothing. All my dance shows went great..I was so proud of my girls (even if a few them forgot their head pieces) But they looked beautiful onstage and off. And i had a great cheering section consisting of Johnny, Mom, Dad, Hannah and Syd. :)

Here are a few of my dancers, backstage...Britney and Sarah

After the show at Bridgewater...John and I made the trek to see Dane Cook in Newport, along with Keri, Jeff, Cin and Mike. It was my 5th time seeing him, and he was as great as ever. His new CD comes out July 26th...Retaliation!!! Can't wait! And after the show, after nearly being arrested by a dick-head cop...John and I snuck up some stairs and got some autographs and pictures of him.

Here is a pic of my other boyfriend, Dane. He had the coolest Tom and Jerry T-shirt too.

Thats all from me....call me if you want to hang out on my week off!! Muah!

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-06-13T12:46:00

2005-06-13T16:46:38Z

The True You

You want your girlfriend or boyfriend to do more for you.

With respect to money, you spend whatever you have.

You think good luck depends on maintaining good relationships with others.

The hidden side of your personality tends to be methodical in your ways - with trouble adapting to the rules of society.

You are tend to think about others' feelings a lot, perhaps because you are so eager to be liked.

When it comes to finding a romantic partner, you will search and search until you find your perfect match.

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-06-12T10:40:00

2005-06-12T15:52:07Z

So, I was typing a paper for my lovely boyfriend for his training acadamy earlier, when it hit me: I forgot how to type a paper. I mean...do I put the date first, or his name????? wow!!! What happened to me?? I used to be a pro at writing papers...I could bang out a 6-pager in about an hour if I had to. I'm pretty depressed by this right about now.

Anyway...all of my dance shows are this week, and I'm pretty excited. But now its time to go on a crash diet for 7 days in order to fit in all of my costumes...fun, fun!

I love Johnny's new schedule..we actually get to see each other before midnight..and the weekends we can act like a normal couple! I love being able to go out to eat on a Saturday night with him....

Laid out by my pool all day yesterday with the fam.....good times. Hopefully, more to come.....

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-05-29T15:03:00

2005-05-29T22:22:44Z

My babies had their dance show today! It was Miss Sydney's first one!

How cute is she???

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-05-24T15:24:00

2005-05-24T19:30:57Z

I can't stand the rain...
My mommy is going to sunny Florida tomorrow without me : (
Johnny got the corrections officer job...he starts academy June 6th
I'm finally taking a vacation after working here for a year and half without one..not sure what I'm going to do..maybe NH for a few days...
My dance show is in 5 weeks...you should come!

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-05-20T13:58:00

2005-05-20T17:59:32Z

When it comes to relationships, maybe we're all in glass houses, and shouldn't throw stones. Because you can never really know. Some people are settling down, some are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less. Than butterflies...

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-05-09T12:03:00

2005-05-09T16:24:46Z

Haven't updated in awhile...been busy working, dancing, drinking.....

May reminds me of graduation......I can't believe its been two years already. Going back to Dean for dance company brought back alot of memories of the weeks leading up to graduation.....the warm weather, my room in Adams, dancing barefoot in the MPR all day...and going back for rehearsal all night, the anticipation of going out and getting drunk after rehearsals, Dominoes and cheez-its at 2am, fighting back the tears in Nailah's last modern class, taking our last reverence in Jill's ballet class, seeing Mrs.P right after graduation...those three words she whipsered to me, getting a card from my mom in the bathroom after graduation..and crying after reading the first word she wrote in it, watching steph drive away from New Hall for the last time, john and i cleaning out his room..the last two people left on campus, realizing my college experience was over, wishing i could turn back the clocks back to freshman year so i could soak in the memories, friendships, and experiences all over again.....

haha, this is great

2005-04-25T00:16:13Z

Its called karma, baby

2005-04-17T23:03:53Z

I've started updating on Sunday nights after work for some reason..take it or leave it, biotch!
Saw Fever Pitch on Thurday....awesome movie! I am so totally pumped for the Sox season this year.......
Which is awesome since Leanne is taking Johnny and me to the game on April 25th!! Cannot wait!!!!! Last time i was in Fenway Park, I was 4 years old and cried for the entire game..hehe, sorry dad!
I love my white capris that i just bought at Bob's*
Reading an awesome book at the moment: The Tipping Point, by Malcolm Gladwell. I'm completly mesmerized by it and I highly reccommend it to y'all
currently craving brownies....hmm...think im gonna go make some....mmmmmmmmm...

You aint so tough

2005-04-10T23:11:59Z

Haven't written any updates in awhile...prob because I no longer have internet access at work! Total bummer..I dont know what to do with myself anymore..guess its back to reading books in my office. (I still have email..so feel free to write to me at work anytime!)

Well, the Starbound dance competion was yesterday...and it went great! Both my pieces got Gold, and my "Uptown Girl" number got a special Judges Award...I was so proud of my girls! I was a bitch to them the night before at rehearsal, so they deserved good recognition for how hard they worked. Here we are before they went on:

Gina and I decided we want to do alot more competions now, and I think I want to teach full-time next year..screw the gym...they suck!!!!!

Thats about all for me...Im working all week, except on Thursday. Johnny and I are gonna spend the day together and go on a date to see Fever Pitch that night. Cant wait til then! Bye y'all!

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-04-05T20:35:00

2005-04-06T03:39:21Z

Supposed to be beautiful out tomorrow.....skirt with my new cute summery shoes to work?? I think so.

Boredness!!

2005-03-29T15:27:12Z

FIRSTS
1. First Best Friend : Joy Sawyer
2. First Pet : my Cleopatra..she is still around...i have no clue how!
3. First Car : "The Blowout!" let it ride.....

LASTS
1. Last Cigarette : never eva
2. Last Kiss : peck on the cheeck from johnny this morning before work
3. Last Good Cry : hmmm..watching "the notebook" with jess a few weeks ago
4. Last Beverage Drank : water
5. Last Food Consumed : Tollhouse cookies that i made for john and i last nite
6. Last(Current) Crush : Gavin D.
7. Last Phone Call : Tina telling me Sue was on Dance 360 and to turn on UPN.

RELATIONSHIPS
1. Who Is Your Best Friend : i have a few..but if i had to choose one..John. : )
2. Do You Have A Girlfriend/Boyfriend : yes, see above

FASHION STUFF
1. Where Are Your Favourite Places To Shop : dont ask this question to me....Rampage, Express, Kohl's, American Eagle, Gap Body
2. Favorite Item Of Clothing : hmmm..prob my black pin striped pants, since i wear them all the time..they are the staple of my wardrobe!

SPECIFICS
1. Do You Do Drugs : naahh
2. What Kind Of Shampoo Do You Use : Back to Basics, currently Marine
3. What Are You Most Scared Of : dying, getting married, spiders
4.What Would You Change About Yourself : the fact that i hate change

FAVORITES
1. Colors : im a pink girl
2. Foods : Pizza, pasta, cookies..nice, no wonder im fat
3. Subject In School: since i was a dance major...modern
4. Animals : kitties
5. Movies: Grease, Forrest Gump, Ray

HAVE YOU EVER
1. Given Anyone A Bath: Hannah and Syd all the time..
2. Made Yourself Throw Up : cant recall
3. Skinny-Dipped : hello...we have a pool at my house..what else would i be doing in it??
CURRENT
1. Clothes : black pants, and pink shirt with my black sweater over it
2. Music : the techno playing from the aerobics studio right outside my office
3. Make-Up : the usual...pink and brown for my eyes and some chapstick,...my lips are so chapped!
4. IM's : none..we cant do that at work

LAST PERSON
1. Hugged : hmmm...either johnny, or whoever was the last person out of my house on Easter...Aunt Patty maybe?
2. IMed : Bob!
4. Last Person Who Slept At Your House : prob my babies..hannah and syd
5. Last Person's House You Slept At : always john's apartment

RANDOM
1. I'm craving a salsa bagel from Dunkin Donuts
2. My new favorite song is "Lonely no more", by Rob Thomas

3. Orbit Gum in Bubblemint rocks!

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-03-27T10:24:00

2005-03-27T15:34:07Z

Happy Easter Bunny!!

Is it sad that I'm 24 and still look forward to the Easter basket that I get every year??

Got back from New Hampshire yesterday....had a fun, relaxing time with Johnny, Keri and Jeff. I gave snow-mobiling a try one more time, and liked it alot better this time. Never go snow-mobiling your first time at night with a crappy helmet that fogs up. It's not a good time! Being up there for a few days makes me want to take a REAL vacation..somewhere tropical...i really want to go away soon. So start saving your dough johnny-o!

Well, I have 4 and half hours of work left and then i get to go home and watch the babies have their Easter Egg Hunt! I'm sure I'll steal a few for my basket too.....

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-03-22T09:36:00

2005-03-22T14:43:41Z

My boyfriends roomate is a fucking prick. You wonder why you are 27 and haven't been on a date in almost a year? Because you are a desperate and pathetic piece of shit. Instead of worrying about how to "mack it" to every girl you come into contact with, why dont you worry about the fact that you are bald and haven't even reached 30 years old. Grow up and grow some balls and maybe then a girl will look at you and not want to vomit.

Thank you.

follow through...

2005-03-20T17:38:46Z

Boo..I hate Sundays.

This weekend, hung out with some cool kids. St. Patty's Day..drank lots of green stuff...saw lots of people..met a tool from Brooklyn, so I got to reminisce about my days in NYC...sigh.

Keri and I had a sleep-over on Friday nite because our boyfriends are dumb. Slept in her wind-tunnel room...she's a weirdo!

Saturday, I had rehearsal all day at Gina's studio. If we can get these pieces finished and looking good in three weeks for the competition, it will be a miracle. It was fun to see Steph...I miss dancing everyday with that girl : ( And looking like homeless people when we go anywhere. Came up with a great idea for the opening number at Bertucci's..we are so cool. Major rehearsals over the next few weeks!

I'm gonna be a busy little bee.....

Went shopping last nite and got some h-o-t underwear and nighties..or whatever you call them. Pink and black...rrrrrr! Tried to find a bathing suit, but failed miserably. Why is the one I want on back-order til the end of May!?

Did i mention how much I love Gavin Degraw...cuz i really do.

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-03-16T16:25:00

2005-03-16T21:27:38Z

I just ate almost an entire box of Parmesean Goldfish by myself....what up fatty???

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-03-13T10:18:00

2005-03-13T15:29:50Z

I don't think I like the weekends anymore. I used to look forward to them, and actually do fun things on Friday and Saturday nights...but lately...it's just been bleh. Maybe its the winter and this crazy weather we have been having, but I have had like the shittiest weekends recently. Maybe its cuz i dont really see you much, and we fight alot more when we arent together. grrrrr...things are frustrating right now. I need a vacation..somewhere tropical and hot. Any takers? The first drink is on me.

On a better note, my girls are going to a dance competiton in April.....I'm pretty excited..it will be their first one. But that means extra rehearsals and Becky being a bitch. I'm sure they are already used to that anyways. I think we have like 9 rehearsals til the competition...yikes! Wiichhha (thats my whip cracking).

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-03-09T18:38:00

2005-03-09T23:40:30Z

You scored as Ariel. Your alter ego is Ariel, the little mermaid! You are a dreamer, and you often want what you can't have. You can be rebellious and sometimes disobey your parents to get what you want.

</td>

Goofy

63%

Ariel

63%

Cinderella

63%

Cruella De Ville

56%

Sleeping Beauty

56%

The Beast

56%

Donald Duck

50%

Peter Pan

44%

Pinocchio

31%

Snow White

31%

Which Disney Character is your Alter Ego?
created with QuizFarm.com</tr>

im_a_carrie81 @ 2005-03-06T18:32:00

2005-03-07T02:33:03Z

This weekend was up and down.

Adam--I'm so sorry about your loss. : ( I love you.

The Notebook..finally watched it, after I bought it about a month and a half ago. Soooo good, soooo sad, soooo in love with Noah!! Why can't all boys be like him, right Jess?? Kel, i did recognize him from Breaker High...lol. He was also in Remember the Titans!

Friday night...not so fun. I know I have to learn how to trust more..but you need to work with me too..when I hear things like that, it's really hard to trust completly....

Baby Shower today!...Here's some pics!

Sydney and me

Sheri and Hannah